The Lowdown

Alright I want some fucking cheese! That's it, I want a big brick of melting Cheddar, motzorella-idontcarehowyouspellit, swiss, all of it. I want bre on bread and those cheese logs that you have at christmas with crackers (Nick you know whats up). Nachos! thats it, thats what I want, something that looks like you would have a heart attack when you eat it. I mean the food here is good, really good, its Indian food 24-7, so I get lots of beans, cauliflower, chili pepper, potatoes ect. all in more sauces (its all gravy here) then I know. But I don't get cheese, and for those of you in the know, a main staple of my diet is Cheddar cheese, melted that is, over some kind of tortia thingy. Yeah its called a quesadilla, I remember now, with some beans and salsa, but I would leave all that out so I could enjoy the oilly-goodness that is the melted cheeze. After finishing this I would open a beer, the cheapest-shit-ass-beer I could get at market (you all are still just calling it market right?) and chug it. It will happen, until then I will settle for my Indian veggies, which I will admit, satisfy me after each meal, where I gorge my self on (once you start you just cant stop!). I have gained about 60 lbs!..... ok well maybe I will one day. HA! That reminds me, the last several wickram, oops sorry I just found out they are actually Vickrams (fucking accent), anyways these fat ladies keep sitting next to me squashing me! So I aways am just sitting there in the vickram and they just come up and think that they can fit in this tiny seat that already has 3 people on it. When she sits next to me (and they always do) I am left literally hanging out of the fucking window, and for some reason they always seem to be mad about it.
Moving along; A criticism of India: The government here needs to employ every bum and poor person to pick up the trash and then sort it into recycling and stuff. This would clean everything and give jobs to people who need it most, I mean the people are going through the trash anyway so why not pay them for it and put it to some use. This along with an anti-littering campaign (picture crying Indian, but him now being Hindu. HA!) would do wonders for everyone.
One more thing. I think that I may be sustaining some kind of serious damage to my bladder. No shit, ok. I have been trying to stay healthy, you know, drinking lots of water so I dont get sick from all the sick people, which naturally makes me have to urinate. The problem is that most places here dont have restrooms, I have no idea where they go to pee! Ok well public urination is pretty big here and I have gotten a lot of practice, but come on, I just find my self about to pee my pants at least once a day! peeeace